My new financial lifestyle started a little less than 4 months ago and with this blog and PF community as my accountability partner, I thought I was able to communicate with my hubby better to actually be on the “same page” in this journey called our life. I even mentioned it in another post about how we have the same financial goals now and we’re both on board with budgeting and etc. And, yes, we have been following our budget and have been better at paying down our debt. However, what we were thinking inside our head was completely different. Mainly what we were thinking about how the other person was perceiving this situation was very different.
I had a post about life insurance few weeks back in this post. At this point, I was only researching and thinking by myself about life insurance. And recently, I felt like it’s important enough to bring it up to my hubby to talk about it and make a final decision. I was not expecting for my hubby to react the way he did. He didn’t think life insurance was necessary for us and thought that money could be put else where. Ok, he has his own opinion, that’s fine, but I didn’t think he would flat out oppose to it. But that’s not why I’m bringing this up.
My husband thought that the past few months of us budgeting and changing our spending habits have been a major stress factor for me. He felt like instead of putting that money to life insurance, I could use it to find a new hobby to make me less stressed and not be so restricted to do anything due to lack of money. He said that he would rather use that money to provide some kind of relief for me from this financial budgeting madness.
I was dumbfounded, because I wasn’t and am not stressed. I don’t like having debt like everybody else and I do admit that I was overwhelmed in the beginning when I realized what kind of mess we were in. But I soon found joy in taking control of ourlives and looking at our numbers getting better little by little. We clearly saw different things in each other and read the other person totally wrong.
At the end, he agreed to getting life insurance for both of us one year from now. But until then, put that money aside for my own personal fun use to do whatever I want. I argued that I would be happy to put that money toward our debt, but for some reason, he wants me to keep that money away from everything else but me. I reluctantly agreed. Even if I’m perfectly fine, he’s still not convinced. We were on the same page on the outside and yes, we are still, but it’s interesting to see how we perceive each other’s attitude toward the same situation so differently. One thing for sure is that we need to communicate with each other better and more clearly.
Have you ever thought you were on the same page with your significant other just to find out you weren’t?